Nine Portmanteaus for Men Who Do Traditionally Female Things


A few years back, the term "metrosexual" entered the English language. It was what we call a portmanteau, a word that mashes together two different words to form something in between a compound word and a pun. (Brunch, jewfro and infomercial are all portmanteaus.) "Metrosexual" itself referred to a straight man with an interest in girly things like skin care, high fashion and good grooming. Since then, metropolitan heterosexual men everywhere have been adopting things that were previously considered to be for women only. And the portmanteaus to describe these changes have blossomed. To wit:

  1. Manny. A male nanny.
  2. Bromance. Deep platonic love between two straight guys. Often, male friends involved in a bromance go out on a "mandate", having dinner together as opposed to simply watching the game in a bar. Note: "mandate" as used here isn't technically a portmanteau. The English language is a tricky beast.
  3. Manscaping. Delicately put, this refers to the traditionally non-male activity of, um, shaving below the neck.
  4. Boyzilian. A lad who is seriously into manscaping might just get himself a Boyzilian, which is a play off of the "Brazilian" type of extreme bikini waxing popular among certain young women in recent years.
  5. Manorexia. The dark side of male femininity, this describes the condition of the young dudes who starve themselves in order to squeeze into those skinny jeans.
  6. Guyliner. A current fad among young men, particularly urban hipsters and would-be rock stars, is the wearing of mascara. Usually this is done only when counterbalanced by manly five o'clock shadow.
  7. Himbo. Physically attractive but shallow and unintelligent, the himbo knows what to wear and who to sleep with, but not much beyond that.
  8. Manstress. Sometimes a himbo, occasionally maybe a manny, the manstress is the "bit on the side" for married women (and perhaps also for attached gay men).
  9. Manties. This last word was coined by my wife, and although it hasn't yet entered the lexicon, it does accurately describe the silky, high-cut bikini briefs that some gents prefer. I must warn you that after Googling the word, I found a site that sells what appears to be frilly, lacy girls' underpants meant for grown men. This is not what I am talking about.